I was developing a Tip for Tuesday that didn’t go quite as planned. Wait- that was an understatement, it went horribly wrong. But because I believe one can learn from both success and failure equally, I will share my embarrassment with you.

Consider this a “Don’t try this” Tip for Tuesday.

I was making a delicious chicken dish that I have made several times before. The recipe requires me to pound my chicken breast to 1/8 of an inch thick. If you’ve done this before you know what a bitch this can be.  Ten minutes and one numb hand later,  I managed to get only 1 flattened. I still had 6 more to go. I thought surely there must be an easier way. And as a think-outside-the-box kinda girl, I thought I had the most brilliant idea ever! (spoiler alert- I was wrong)

Here are the steps I took:

1. Place chicken breasts between two large pieces of wax paper.

2. Carefully slide the breasts into a garbage bag, then double bag with another garbage bag.

“Why can’t you be like other mothers?”

3. Keeping the trash bag o’ chicken horizontal, slide it onto a cookie sheet and transport outside.

4. Place the garbage bag on the ground in front of your car wheel, removing the cookie sheet.

5. Gently roll over the bag with your car while asking your kids if you’re “on it yet’. forward, reverse, forward, reverse, etc.

6. Sadly hear the bag pop  and watch chicken breasts fly onto the driveway.

7. Place chicken breasts in the trash with the dog’s poop bag (because he crapped when he heard the pop).

8. Order pizza

I would have never mentioned this to Brian but I accidentally left the cookie sheet in the driveway and he demanded an explanation. Plus, Collin taped the whole thing on his iTouch to show his friends. He called it a “FAIL”.

I hope my experience prevents you from making the same mistake (because you know you would have tried it eventually).