Hey Kim,

I can’t take the bickering between the two girls (my daughter and niece). They may as well be sisters because they spend everyday together. I told them in the car today that I am going to keep a squirt bottle on me so every time one of them whines, takes something from the other, or slaps the other, I am going to squirt them. It worked to keep the cat off the counter. I figure, they are acting like animals so why not treat them like one. It’s more PC than a cattle prodder right? Thoughts….lol!

Emily in Bickerington, WA

Dear Emily,

I like your idea and I totally respect people that think outside the box. However, I see the water squirting as a potential mold and mildew problem. You’re going to be squirting so much that your house is going to be constantly soaked. I, myself, have gone through this problem with my own children. I have a possible solution but let me begin with a little story…

Once upon a time, I had a fish tank that contained a Barb fish, a newt, a fresh water crab, and a Betta fish. I’m not sure if you’re familiar with the characteristics of these aquatic creatures but this was a bad, bad combination. The kid at “Wet Dreams Fish Emporium” could’ve told me as much but he was too busy flirting with the girl restocking the fluorescent aquarium gravel.

Anyway, within hours of meeting one another, the Betta attacked the barb and the barb chewed the feet off of the newt (who we named Nubby). It was a savage scene.

So you know what I did Emily? I separated them. That’s right, I set up aquariums all around the room and gave them each their own space to swim safely and freely.

I wish I could tell you that this story had a happy ending. Unfortunately it doesn’t. The new tanks didn’t have lids so it wasn’t long before our cats ate both the fish. And a few days after that I found the fresh water crab in the back of my bedroom closet, dead. And in his claw, he held the lifeless body of the newt. A murder-suicide.

But here’s my point…separate them. Now I understand that you can’t physically separate them because you need to care for them both, so visually separate them. One word for you…blinders, because out of sight = out of mind.

I’m going to show you how to make blinders. The kids can wear these at home, in the car, at stores or restaurants, basically anywhere you want them to ignore each other. I even use these to watch TV when my family is in the room.

*I don’t recommend them when crossing the street.

Blinders

Materials:

Pop tart box

headband

duct tape

scissors

materials to decorate

Instructions:

1. Cut the panels from the pop tart box

2. Let each child decorate the plain side of 2 panels

3. Attach 1 panel to each side of a headband with duct tape

4. It’s ready to wear! Enjoy the silence of having 2 children ignore one another!

Emily, I hope I was able to help you. I understand that this isn’t a perfect solution but it’s the best one I have to offer. It really has worked out for us. Each kid gets that “only child” special feeling and, while we discourage eye contact, we do let them write letters to one another to keep in touch. Plus they see each other on holidays and the occasional play date.

Please let me know how you’re doing, unless it’s bad…I only enjoy pleasant emails.

Good Luck!

Kim

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